The crisp, fall air signals the reminder of “cuffing season” for all of us single ladies. Coined to describe the period of time from October through February in which single people scramble to find short-term (or long-term) relationships, cuffing season is an emotional crutch we fall back on to get through the dreariest time of year with someone to cuddle. While that sounds nice, it may not be the healthiest choice, especially this year. So before you bring back the wanted poster for a potential partner, take a breath and think through these self-care pointers.
Think About Your Health (Thanks, Covid)
Taking the season to prioritize your health, whether it be physically or mentally, is something to be commended. Think of this time as a chance to get to know you better. Come warmer weather, you’ll be ready for whatever comes next.
The Pressure Can Be Mentally Exhausting
Sure, it’s cuffing season, but that doesn’t mean the perfect short-term relationship is out there waiting for you. Finding a relationship (at least one that’s worthwhile, even in the short term), is a time consuming process, and the pressure to find a relationship fast can lead to poor decisions.
Placing pressure on yourself to achieve something that’s not in your control isn’t good for your well-being. If you do choose to seek a cuffing season relationship, be sure to do so carefully and without placing any unnecessary pressure on yourself. What’s meant to be will be, and everything else can wait.
The Holidays Are What You Make Of Them
Many people seek relationships during cuffing season because of the number of holidays that can leave single people feeling lonely. When you don’t have the perfect couple’s costume, can’t decorate the tree with your love, or have to spend dreaded Valentine’s Day dateless, it’s easy to feel overwhelmingly lonely.
Remember that relationships aren’t the end-all-be-all when it comes to love. Rather than forcing a relationship, spend time with the friends and family that reciprocate your love. It’s possible not to feel alone, even without an intimate relationship.
You Have to Love Yourself Before You Love Someone Else
Cue the eye roll. Yes, it’s an annoying, clichéd statement, but it’s a true one. Cuffing season is notoriously a time for individuals to dive into a relationship they are not ready for because they don’t want to be alone.
Being alone is the best way to learn what you want out of a relationship. What’s your type? What’s a deal breaker for you? How do you typically behave in a relationship? Is there anything you want to work on? Spending the time to get to know yourself will help build confidence and prevent you from settling for less than you deserve. It’s not easy at first, but when you spend time with yourself, you begin to see your own value and needs. A relationship isn’t necessary to fulfillment; it can be a nice bonus, but it’s not a necessity.
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