It’s a bad date, and you’re stuck on it. Or are you? There are some pretty sneaky, simple ways you can use to rescue yourself from a bad date — you know, without letting the other person know that you’re trying to escape.
Fake A Sudden Illness
You can always try to fake an emergency by having a friend call you (heck, there’s even an app that will do this for you), but this is a pretty transparent move. After all, many people have pulled this one at least once. Get a little more creative and kill any sort of romantic vibe by faking “sick.” It’s pretty easy.
Make some gross faces, or just look as though you’re surprised about something, and then dramatically excuse yourself to the restroom. Go toward the restroom at a pretty fast pace. Once there, mess yourself up a bit. Dampen your face and neck, rough up your hair, unbutton something or take off your belt. Wait a few minutes, then go back to your date. Apologize profusely and act bummed when you tell them you need to go home. They should be all too happy to cut the evening short…because they probably don’t want to deal with your bathroom problems.
If you feel like your acting abilities just aren’t up to snuff, or you know for a fact that you aren’t a very good liar, simply pretend to fall asleep. You can do this on any date whatsoever, and no matter where and when you do, it’s going to turn your date totally off. It’s going to look particularly bad if you do it at the table when you’re out to lunch or dinner. When your date wakes you up (as they will inevitably do), say anything you want. Tell them you’re on medication, you haven’t slept in three days or even that you get bored easily. Because no matter what you say, they are likely going to end the date and let you go home.
Burst Into Tears
If you can’t do the first two things, burst into tears after something that they say. If you blame your hormones and say it happens all the time, it still might not get you off the hook. Instead, say something like “my ex used to say that all the time” and go running for the ladies’ room. By the time you get back, they should already be paying the check, bringing the car to the curb or otherwise making arrangements to put an immediate end to the evening.
If you have trouble producing tears on command, as even veteran Hollywood actors do from time to time, just fake it. Bury your face in your hands, making crying noises, say something that’s mostly incoherent and go rushing out of the room. Even if they suspect you’re lying, they’re not going to confront you when it’s so very obvious that you’re trying to get out of the date as quickly as you can.
Honestly, What is the Best Policy?
In an ideal world, you could simply look your date in the eye and say “this isn’t working for me.” The truth is, most people don’t want to hear the truth. Even if they see through your acting, they’re likely to go along with your fiction in order to save face. Sometimes, the theatrics are the much kinder course of action. And hopefully, you won’t have too many opportunities to use your bag of bad date tricks.