Of course, you’re so happy for your bestie who is totally smitten with their new partner, but you’re not a bad friend for craving some one-on-one time without their significant other hanging around. But how do you tell them this without offending them or hurting someone’s feelings? Fear not! Here are some creative solutions to the issue at hand.
Counter the Offer
If your friend’s partner is always around, try countering their invite to a group activity with one that just involves the two of you. This softens the rejection of their partner and shows them the kind of plans you’re interested in making. For example, if your friend suggests you “all” meet up for mini golf, you could say, “I’m gonna sit this one out, but I still want to see you. How does lunch next week sound?”
Make Very Specific Arrangements
Another solution is to schedule a one-on-one friend date in addition to a couples hang. This makes requesting some alone time with your friend seem like less of a “thing.”
Do Your Thing
Consider planning activities that your friend’s partner might not be interested in. For example, suggest visiting a restaurant you and your friend enjoy but their partner finds too spicy. Or, propose exploring a new bookstore when your friend’s partner isn’t much of a reader. This approach respects your friend’s relationship while creating an opportunity for a friend date. (Hey, their significant other wasn’t NOT invited.)
Hype Up Your Time Together
Be honest with your friend about how much it means to you to hang out with them alone, then ask if just the two of you can do something soon. They can’t blame you for wanting their undivided attention!