When we’re invited to a dinner party, much like our host has made a silent agreement to make us feel at home, we’ve made a silent agreement to be the best guest we can be. So, what are the secrets to being a five-star dinner guest and securing your spot at the table? Here are a few things to keep in mind the next time you’ve been extended an invitation!
RSVP
Make sure to let your host know if you can make it ASAP. This tells your host that their event is your priority and that you aren’t waiting for a “better” offer. And while we’re on the topic, don’t bail on the party. Not only can this wind you up on the “do not invite” list, but it’s also disrespectful to the host, who has gone through a lot of trouble accommodating guests. Emergencies and sicknesses happen, but don’t let commitment become a lost art.
Always Arrive (A Tiny Bit) Late
You read that right: The best guest arrives anywhere from 10-15 minutes later than told because most hosts appreciate some wiggle room to put the finishing touches on the spread, set up the bar, or tidy up an area of their home. It can be stressful when guests arrive early, and the host feels unprepared. In the same vein, don’t be more than 15 minutes late. This is borderline inconsiderate and should be avoided.
***This rule only applies to dinners at the home. If you are invited to a restaurant, always be right on time!
Be Up Front About Restrictions and Allergies
If you have any food restrictions, let your host know when you RSVP. This isn’t info that should be kept until the day of because too much prep has already gone into the menu. Few things are more disheartening than preparing a meal others can’t enjoy.
Dress to the Nines
We aren’t saying you need a ballgown, but you should show up overdressed. This shows that the invite and the party mean a lot to you. If there is a dress code, stick to it; if there is a theme, participate. Check the weather and dress accordingly.
Never Show Up Empty-Handed
Showing up with a small gift for the host is the ultimate party guest move. Wine is always a great go-to, but other options include preserves, local honey, flowers, an herb bouquet, or a candle – just a little something that says, “Thank you for the invitation and all the hard work you put into this.” Be sure to include a note so if the host doesn’t see you bring it, it doesn’t get lost in the shuffle.
Keep an Eye Out
A good host always ensures everyone has a full beverage all night. Do the same for your host. When you notice their glass is getting empty, offer to top them off or make them another cocktail.
Step Away From Your Screen
Don’t text, check email, or scroll social media under the table. There are exceptions, but if an emergency arises, excuse yourself to make a call, then put your phone away again.
Help Out
Offer to help your host clean up, wash dishes, put away leftovers, or anything else that you can do to make their hosting a little easier.
Never Over-Drink
It’s okay to enjoy a couple of cocktails at a dinner party (if you’re not driving), but be responsible, drink in moderation, and make good choices. If you plan on drinking, make sure you have a plan for getting home.
Send a Note of Thanks
After the dinner party, within 12 hours or sooner, send your host a handwritten thank you note expressing your appreciation.
Do you have any tips for being a five-star dinner guest? Share them with us in the comments below!