Don’t worry, you’re not the only couple experiencing a “lull” in your relationship. At one point or another, every duo will go through it. It’s totally normal. You just have to learn the right ways to revitalize your marriage, prioritize intimacy, and make sure you keep that spark and excitement alive.
If you’re stuck on what to do first, here are some suggestions to consider when “spicing up” your marriage.
Toys, Toys, Toys…
You may feel awkward if you’ve never played around with a sexy lil gadget, but trust us when we say, don’t shy away. Incorporating a new toy in the bedroom can easily add sensation to vanilla sex. Just visit an intimate shop and check out what options you have to work with.
Key takeaway: Consider personal and partner’s preferences. You can start simple with a silk blindfold, or take a deep dive and get a vibrator.
Roleplay a Fantasy
Escapism can reduce stress and distract you from mundane day-to-day life. But what type of escape is beneficial in a relationship?
We like to suggest fantasy play. You know, the act of acting. A good go-to example would be this: Get ready for date night, separately. Text one another flirtatiously while you’re dressing. Meet at the agreed upon spot, and pretend like this is your first time out together. Be open to a bit of bluffing and see where the night takes you. When it’s time to shut the lights and hit the hay, the last thing ya’ll will want to do is sleep…
Adopt the Six-Second Kiss Rule
It doesn’t matter what time of day you do it, but kiss for six whole seconds. Continuously. Non-stop. This act of affection will actually form a deep temporary connection between you and your spouse. Some say it immediately sparks desire for more.
Could some silly six seconds of tongue and lip action lead to sexy time? Sure; just try it out and see for yourself. Within one week, you’ll feel romantically closer.
Surprise, Surprise!
There are several love languages to look at when you’re in a committed relationship, one of them being “gifts.”
Even if your spouse doesn’t prioritize this sector of love, it’s still a nice gesture to surprise them with a gift for no special reason.
You don’t have to empty your wallet when shopping, either. A simple flower, new book, or favorite drink will suffice. Remember the phrase, it’s the thought that counts? Very relevant here.
Hit the Gym Together
Gym? Working out? That’s supposed to spice up our marriage?
Believe it or not, yes. But, why? For starters, lifting weights and getting all sweaty together can boost playful competition – and act as foreplay. To continue, exercising releases feel good hormones known as endorphins. When paired with the appearance of your spouse, it can really deepen your emotional – and sexual – connection.
Shower Together
Scrub-a-dub-dub, it’s time to get squeaky clean… with your partner. Turn the nozzle, get wet, and apply soap. You know, clean your body. But this time, with your significant other on the side of you.
While you’re getting all soap and sudsy, look one another in the eye. Sing a tune out loud. Wash each other’s backs. Maneuver the shower head and rinse. Keep it playful, and you’ll see a deeper emotional connection bloom. It’s hard to imagine, but showering with your partner can really open a new chapter in the sensual department.
Don’t Make the Mistake of Waiting Until You’re “in the Mood”
Sex happens when you’re horny. That’s a given. But if you’re trying to spice up things in the bedroom between you and your partner, “in the mood” sex may not happen all the time.
In fact, the spontaneous desire for sex decreases over time. That means if you’re in a long-term relationship, you may not want to get down and dirty every week. But still, it’s crucial to try.
So, make a move on your partner! Chances are, they’ll give into the arousal and start enjoying the passion right alongside you.