How to Grow Old Without Growing Apart

It’s a fact. So, you and your bestie are friends ‘til the end, but currently navigating two completely different stages of life. You’re killing the solo game and pumping the music, she’s changing diapers and pumping the breast milk. As you (slash we) – – grow up & grow old, it’s time to reflect on and examine your closest friendships.

Depending on the individual, experiencing and accepting change can be difficult. This is especially the case when celebrating a major milestone in life leads to even greater change such as the dynamic of a friendship. Whether it’s personal or professional, a change in lifestyle for one really means a change in lifestyle for two: you and your best bud.

For advice on how to remain best friends forever, read on:

1. Learn to Adapt & Take an Interest

With all-night ragers and all-weekend benders a thing of the past (or fingers crossed reserved for special occasions), it’s time to transition from take-home to take-out. To remember: a “party friend” is one in a million, but your gal pal is irreplaceable. These days, while there is less pre-drinking and post-partying and more wining, dining and dishing, the giggles and gossip are all the same. Just think, early dinner reservations will lead to a better nights sleep and you will actually be making it to the gym the next day. It’s a win-win.

In addition to adapting to a table for three, take an interest in the good, bad and ugly of your friend’s new routine. Lend a hand – literally & figuratively. For those beauties on the fence about having kids, it’s the perfect trial run. And vice versa: let your fav fan live vicariously through your blind dates, first kisses, yoga classes, and gym sessions.

2. Keep It Common

When it comes to boys and babies, maybe you and your other half can’t exactly relate to each other. No big deal. When the time is right, change the conversation from child-care to self-care; first steps to personal growth.

Press pause to list all of the reasons why the two of you are so close to begin with: shared interests, core values, personal strengths. Plus, she’s your go-to for style tips, restaurant suggestions, Netflix shows – and a good laugh.

3. Time for Two

Along with wine, cheese, and charcuterie boards, friendship is based on mutual respect and understanding. It takes compromise. With (or without) baby in tow, both of you need to be aware of each other’s circumstances. Note to self: a little effort goes a long way. Whether crossing streets or changing cities to visit each other, it’s necessary to share the responsibility.

With demanding family obligations and work schedules, it’s likely that quality time in-person hangouts are few and far between. Beyond face time on the clock, reach out via text or talk – we all know that your phone is basically attached to your hand. It takes a simple second or two to send a message, a snap, a link or an emoji and let the person know you’re thinking about them. Most importantly, make time for just the two of you. Leave the strollers and side-chicks at home, because she’s all you need.

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